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On my way to work this morning I stopped by Subway to get my lunch. The customer in front of me was grouchy, complaining about the way the vegetables looked, the toppings they didn’t offer, and the cost of everything. The employee reacted to the customer and took the same tone with him as he took with her. I watched as the employee glared at the man as he left the building.
When she turned and asked me what I’d like it was in the same tone of voice that she’d used with the previous customer. Instead of reacting in kind, I made a conscious effort to speak to the employee in a calm, upbeat, civil, fashion. I reverted to the way I was taught to speak to others when I was a child in the 1950’s and ‘60’s. I used phrases like: yes please; no thank you; yes ma’am; and no ma’am. By the time my sandwich was made and I’d selected a pack of chips, I could hear the tone of the employee’s voice changing. When she asked whether I wanted the combo or just the chips, I asked which way would be cheaper. That’s when I saw a real change in the employee’s attitude. In
a very upbeat tone of voice she replied, “Let me check on that for you”. She ran the cost both ways, gave me my options, took my money, and wished me a good day as I left the store.
My name isn’t Pollyanna. My head isn’t stuck in the sand. I don’t believe there are simple solutions to complex problems. However, in a society that is becoming more hostile and more dangerous every day, in a society where our government officials no longer even try to get along with anyone with whom they disagree, in a world where the name of the game is “it’s all about me and mine”, what’s wrong with trying to change things for the better one encounter at a time? What’s wrong with treat
ing others with what we used to call “common decency”? In a society rooted in greed, how much does it really cost us to speak to others in a civil tone and to follow the golden rule in our treatment of others?
If we do these things will they fix what’s wrong with our world? Of course not!!! The best we can hope for is that it might chisel away at the diamond hard chips we’re carrying around on our individual and corporate shoulders and make it a bit easier to work together to look for solutions to what ails us as a society.
In the final analysis, what do we have to lose by trying?
Written by my brother-in-law, David R. Troutman
05/14/2013
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